When John was 71, he was diagnosed with Alzheimer’s. His wife and adult daughter, who lived close by, began encouraging him to see his doctor, it was the result of memory related problems that became more obvious as time marched on.
He was reluctant to visit his doctor because, even though he was concerned about his memory, he didn’t want to find out what was wrong. A lot of people share John’s reluctance to visit a doctor when they notice certain symptoms developing; they don’t want to hear bad news. This certainly was bad news for him, but even though he was still able to take care of himself with only a few reminders, he and the rest of his family understood things weren’t going to remain that way forever.
Still, John was adamant about remaining home.
He wanted to remain home. His wife and adult daughter thought moving into a different facility, one equipped with experienced staff members to help him as the disease progressed, was the better course of action.
He wouldn’t hear anything they had to say.
He didn’t want to consider moving. He wanted to remain home. The prospect of hiring a home care aide never really came up at first. He was simply adamant about wishing to remain where he was, where he had spent the last 20+ years with his wife, but he didn’t think they were hearing him.
He had the right to determine his future.
Because he was still lucid and cogent, especially during these conversations, John had the right to have his decision respected. It took a long time, but eventually his wife came around to realize there was a great benefit in him remaining home. He was surrounded by things of familiarity. She also began to understand that hiring a home care aide, especially somebody who had a lot of experience working with other clients diagnosed with Alzheimer’s, could be beneficial because she could learn a lot about how to properly support him.
At the time, though, shortly after diagnosis, John was still adamant that he could take care of himself. His family eventually learned to respect his decision, but talked more frequently about the future, what was going to happen, and what he would like to happen when he was no longer able to make these cogent decisions for himself.
Ultimately, with that level of love and support, he agreed that hiring home care services was something they would do, when the time came.
If you or an aging loved one are considering hiring Alzheimer’s care in Lancaster, PA, contact the caring staff at Extended Family Care of Lancaster. Call today at (717) 205-2174.
A long-time resident of Lancaster County, Mary Lynne enjoys spending time with her husband Terry, and their 3 horses and collies. The countless hours of caring for her client and employee-based “family” at work and at home can truly depict the selfless character of Mary Lynne Heller.
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